Meeting Messiah

Although raised in a Jewish home, the closest I ever came to religion was when I drove past a synagogue. So when I stopped at a traffic light the thought caught me by surprise: What if there is a God and eternal spiritual life?

At the time, I knew nothing about God's Word, but I did know that if he existed he would not approve of my use of drugs and women, my thefts and generally selfish lifestyle. I would have to change.

But I didn't want to change. So, as the light turned green, I decided the simplest course of action was to ignore the question.

But God did not ignore me. Several months later, while walking toward my apartment, I spotted an anthill along the sidewalk. Hundreds of ants scrambled back and forth in what appeared to be haphazard motion. Then I remembered from my high school biology class that those tiny creatures and vital to the ecosystem. Without their irrigation of the soil, much of the earth's plant life would not be possible. Structure implied someone who did the structuring. By the time I reached my front door, I had forced those thoughts from my mind. I knew where they were heading, and I didn't want to go there.

For the next two years my life careened in an almost hypnotic flow of careless living. But a nagging emptiness followed me. Something was wrong but I didn't yet know what.

Thinking I needed a change of scenery, I joined the Navy in May, 1972. The following October, I spent Yom Kippur (the Day of Atonement)--holiest of Jewish Holidays) alone in my barracks and, for the fist time in years, was honest with myself. I didn't like what I saw. My lifestyle, my rebellion. Worst of all, I didn't think I could change. I pulled my journal from the shelf and wrote, "God, forgive me for my past sins and look with tolerance on my future sins."

Two months later, a friend offered me a copy of a book on biblical prophecy. Amazed, I leafed through the pages, reading hundreds of Messianic prophecies in the Jewish Bible.

Then I read the 53rd chapter of Isaiah. The ancient Jewish prophet spoke of Jesus' sacrifice for my sins:

"But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for out iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed. We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all."

After reading and re-reading the many portions of Old Testament scripture, it suddenly became clear for me. Not only did God love me, but also because Jesus bore the punishment for my sins, I could be forgiven for every last one of my sins.

On December 25, 1972, I prayed, "God, I believe that Jesus is the Messiah." Not a very long prayer, but God saw my heart and knew I was committing my life and my lifestyle to his control. I rose from my knees and flushed the marijuana I had in my room down the toilet. The pornographic magazines went into the trash bin, and my language got a hefty dose of soap. I began telling others that God had forgiven me of every rotten thing I'd ever done-to the annoyance of my friend who soon began avoiding me.

At that time, I didn't understand very much about what commitment to the Messiah meant. But I did understand that I needed his forgiveness and his help to change my life. I did understand the simple promise of Scripture: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16).

If God did this for me, he will do it for anyone. He only waits for someone to look toward him.

An Anonymous Jewish Brother